That Sexy Wife

So What Became of The Knight?

And so the knight sets out on his journey to answer this impending question. Through highs and lows, he finds out that every woman has a different answer to his question. Some want to be beautiful, some want to be flattered, some want to do whatever they want. Additionally, another common answer was that women wanted to be considered quiet and mysterious. This left the knight in shambles, as he did not have any solid answer to this question. Sadly, after a year of toiling around, the knight decides to head back to the king and see what fate has in store for him. On his way home though, the knight sees a group of women dancing. Curious, the knight draws in close to the group when all of a sudden, all but a haggard looking woman is left.

This mysterious woman would be the key to the knight though, as once he told her his predicament, she promised that she would get him out of his situation if he were to marry her. And like that, the knight and the old lady headed back to Arthur's court, where a large crowd expected to see the results. Surprisingly, this old lady was right, and as a result...what women wanted most in life was to be in control of their husbands and their lovers. This left the knight free of all guilt and was free to go, however he still had one promise left.

Yes, Yes, he did have to marry the  old woman, and while he did wish to give her all his possessions rather than marrying her, he kept his word and married her.

When in bed, the old lady asks the knight why he doesn't seem so happy. Obviously, he replies that he is married to an ugly old wife that he does not crave at any moment. This stirs the old woman and she asks him one question:

"Choose now," she said, "one of these two things:
                  To have me ugly and old until I die,
                  And be to you a true, humble wife,
                  And never displease you in all my life,
                  Or else you will have me young and fair,
                  And take your chances of the crowd
                  That shall be at your house because of me,
                  Or in some other place, as it may well be.
                  Now choose yourself, whichever you please."

The knight thinks about it for a moment and then declares that he would rather have her in the right judgment, regardless of the fact that she looked like hell. This pleases the old lady, and as a result, she gets the answer that most woman would have wanted. Out of nowhere, she transforms into a beautiful maiden that is both gorgeous and good. Both have a great marriage and end up living happily for many years to come.

I will end my story with this quote:

                  “In perfect joy; and Jesus Christ us send
                  Husbands meek, young, and vigorous in bed,
                  And grace to outlive them whom we wed;
                  And also I pray Jesus shorten their lives
                  That will not be governed by their wives;
                  And old and angry misers in spending,
                  God send them soon the very pestilence!”

That Sexy Wife

Oh Yes, My Tale!

Once upon a time, oh I always wanted to start a story like dat!! lol!!!!

In the land of Arthur, there reigned friars and the court of the king, which would be home to many of the people in the British Isles. Here, a rape by a friar was dishonor to women, but an incubi would get them pregnant.

On one fateful day, there was a young and horny knight who happened to come by a beautiful maiden one day. Rather than court her and win her over like a normal man would, he decided to rape her. All over King Arthur's court, everyone is shook by the crime and Arthur and his men conclude that the knight should die by decapitation. The women present in the court however, were a little more lenient, and asked the king to give the knight one more chance to redeem himself. The king, never one to ignore the advice of women, decides to give Arthur a final chance, but with a challenge. The knight will have to roam various places to answer one question:


With only a year to find the answer to this vague question, the knight was encountered with a life or death situation, since not finding the correct answer would leave him headless.
That Sexy Wife

The Bad Husbands (Or the Prologue Pt. 3)

Now the remaining of my husbands. These are what I call the bad marriages. When I met my fourth husband, I was still somewhat young. Oh yes, I remember he had a mistress. But how lively those days were. He was so young, and I, still embracing my younger days, felt rejuvenated after a long time. And the sex! Oh, how we would play forever in the fields, flirt in the alleys, and make love in the sheets! lol. Yes, I know that he was young, and I was still an older woman, but I still had some lust left in me, and I definitely planned to make full use of it. Hee Hee, as a matter of fact, I remembered how I always tried to make him jealous. Oh yeah, that sure would get him riled up, and all for nothing, as those were just pure lies on my part. but alas, he died on a journey to Jerusalem, which would prompt me to look for my fifth husband.

I actually met my fifth husband when my fourth husband was still alive. Yet I still remained faithful mind you...I made sure I had no relations with him. Jankyn was his name, the young student. He was not rich or anything, but it was his youthful attitude that instantly attracted me to him. Yes, it is true, women do indeed go for what is forbidden to them, and in this case, I was no exception. I was head over heels for Jankyn. I still had to put on a show though, so at the funeral, I cried a river and made sure everyone understood that I was in suffering.

But anyways, when we were togethor, I realized that I did marry him for love, and not money. Yes, yes, he was 20 and I was 40, but how sexual he was. He was a great partner. Of course, the fact that he was younger also meant that he was more resistant to my abuse, as compared to my other husbands. As a matter of fact, he was hard to control. He even had a book on evil wifes throughout history that he used to read to me every night! How I hate that book. One day, I had it up to here with that book and I decided to rip three pages out of the book and to hit Jankyn in the face! In retaliation, he striked me in the head, which if you all didn't know, is the reason that I am deaf in one ear.

But anyways besides all that, we resolved our issues and lived happily ever!

Now, enough about my marriages...time for the story!

                "By mastery, all the sovereignty,
                And that he said, `My own true wife,
                Do as you please the rest of all thy life;
                Guard thy honor, and guard also my reputation' --
                After that day we never had an argument."
That Sexy Wife

You Interrupting Pardoner!! (or Prologue Pt. 2)

Well, then, if it wasn't for the Pardoner, I would be well on my way to continuing my exciting story. Anyways, throughout my exciting life, I would have to say that three of my marriages have been pleasant. Whereas, two of them can be considered a failure. I can only say this because the first three were rich and old. I was still young at the time so I was considered a prize to them, a prize that they had to pay much attention to. As a matter of fact, this is one of the guilt trips that I would give to my older husbands:

I would accuse them of cheating on me and would make them feel bad by making false stories and speculation. HAHA, oh how this would eventually get them every time. Oh yeah, if they ever came home drunk, I would also tell them that they would charge me with statements that made every woman seem to be out to kill her husband! He would feel so bad! I could ask them for all their money and I am sure I would've had it. In this manner, you could say that I had the leash on my husbands.

And finally my favorite...when in bed. Oh how those old men quivered when I refused to give them full satisfaction just when they were at their peak. At this point, I could ask for anything I wanted and they would give it to me, all using my sexual powers!

Now do you realize the extent of my sexual powers?!

"Since you so preach of Job's patience.
 Suffer always, since you so well can preach;
 And unless you do, certainly we shall teach you
 That it is fair to have a wife in peace.
 One of us two must bow, doubtless,
 And since a man is more reasonable
 Than a woman is, you must be able to bear suffering.
  What ails you to grouch thus and groan?"
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That Sexy Wife

A Little Bit About Myself (Or The Prologue)

Hey Y'all!! hee hee!!

wow, have I got stories for you kids. As a matter of fact, when it comes to marriage and relationships, I am the person to come to, since I have plenty of experience in this arena. Lusty or not, the fact is that since the tender age of twelve, I was married for the first time. Tee Hee...

And I don't care about what all of you lot think about marriage and the principles that come with religion. Yes, I know that Christ ordained that there shall be one man for one woman, but I feel that this is the interpretation of mankind himself. I mean, because men said Jesus laid down that there shall be 1 woman for 1 man, we now have to follow that like a rulebook? I have experience in this. Plenty of experience, and all I have to say is try to put yourself in my shoes. I mean didn't god put us out there to procreate and maintain humanity at its peak? You sex. Now this is the part that I believe in, and I will sponsor it no matter what, because it is the part that can actually be read in the scriptures.

Hell, even people like Solomon and Jacob enjoyed the benefits of having more than one mate, so what is to say that I can't? As a matter of fact, wasn't all mankind made the same way, so what would allow some to have multiple partners and others have to remain single? Yes, Yes, I know that virginity is one of the staples that Jesus upholds in order to keep woman pure and faithful, but if you really think about it, don't we all have to procreate in order to create more virgins? LMAO!!

But anyways, I leave the task of perfection to you nice ladies. As for me, I will keep having as much sex as I want, since in this world of oppressed women, I can use it as a tool to control men.
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